The risk of indifference: leadership’s quietest failure

I didn’t decide one day to become indifferent. It crept in. A shrug here, a silence there. And by the time I saw it, the damage had already taken root.

Elie Wiesel once warned: “The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.” That phrase haunts me. Especially now, in leadership. Because indifference is not dramatic. It doesn’t announce itself with sirens. It seeps in quietly. And its consequences run deep.

What indifference looks like in leadership

Indifference doesn’t always look cruel. Sometimes it can mean:

• ignoring a concern because it’s ‘not urgent’
• letting a toxic high performer off the hook
• skimming over someone’s exhaustion
• avoiding uncomfortable feedback
• choosing tasks over people

We rationalise it. We’re busy. We’re being strategic. We’ll ‘come back to it’. But people notice. Over time, these moments tell a story – of what we care about and what we don’t.

In one project I led, multiple people quietly flagged a supplier concern. I nodded, moved on. I assumed it would settle. Months later, that same issue became a full-blown reputational problem. I hadn’t acted maliciously, just indifferently. And it cost us.

How indifference creeps in

Leaders rarely become indifferent overnight. Indifference creeps in when we’re:

• overwhelmed – and start triaging empathy
• exhausted – and become numb to nuance
• afraid – and avoid conflict or truth
• senior – and drift from day-to-day realities

These aren’t excuses, but they are warnings. If we’re not alert, indifference becomes the default.

The cost of indifference

Indifference corrodes trust. It sends the message that small things and small people don’t matter. It can:

• erode culture – people stop raising concerns or ideas
• breed disengagement – colleagues disconnect emotionally
• normalise silence – minor injustices become background noise
• damage credibility – once you notice, it may be too late to restore trust

Conversely, even a brief moment of attentiveness – asking a question, noticing discomfort, stepping in – can build loyalty for years.